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The first half of my life
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Recently, I am watching “The first half of my life”. It about a mature-aged lady from a housewife to be an independent woman.
ZiJun Luo graduated from the Uni, instead of pursuing a career she got married, then to be a stay-at-home Mum taking care of husband and kid.
She contented with the life: shopping, skin care, restaurants etc. Her primary goal was staying young so that she could keep the marriage to maintain the luxury lifestyle everyone admires.
ZiJun was Jealous of girls who stayed together with husband. One day, while she was waiting for the husband in his office, a young lady who’s wearing necklace walked through, it looked the same as the one husband bought for a client.
ZiJun thought husband cheated on her, she grabbed the girl and broke the necklace in front of his colleagues.
From a lovely girl, ZiJun was becoming a rude woman, though she didn’t care, the only thing matters were keeping husband with her the whole life.
ZiJun didn't realize one day husband announced that they must get a divorce; she was out of mind as the lady was an ordinary middle-aged career woman with a kid.
ZiJun cried over and over; she couldn’t imagine the life without a rich man, she begged husband that she could do anything as long as he returned to the family.
However, she’s no longer attractive to her husband. Eventually, the marriage was broken.
The good thing of leaving husband is not as bad as ZiJun imagined, she has just got life started in her middle 30s.
She starts from the bottom of the society; she’s struggling with life and has no one to rely on except herself.
She has to make money to pay for bills and living expenses. Unfortunately, she was refused from several job interviews because from stereotype, a Shanghai lady can’t compete with young people from other parts of China for doing labour work.
ZiJun had no work experience and was sacked the first job as a shop assistant in the supermarket.
She was very disappointed and doubted whether she had the ability to earn money.
Fortunately, HanHe, a friend introduced her job in a department store where she can do what she good at - selling Max Mara shoes as she’s very familiar with luxury brands and can read minds of wealthy customers.
Before she lived in an ivory tower, she got everything wanted from husband except she didn’t have real friends apart from JingTang.
She was arrogant and took it for granted what she got. She didn’t respect the housekeeper, looked down on her sister and sister-in-law, she was rude to the shop assistant at the department store and colleagues of her husband.
ZiJun regarded herself as a princess and was born of a lucky one who deserved good life style.
She used to laugh at HanHe and regarded him as a horrible man. She didn’t know appreciation until later on, she said: “Thank you” to HanHe from the inner heart after Zijun experienced the worst part of life.
The main reason ZiJun lost husband because she’s no longer to be herself. She sacrificed everything as long as husband liked, even after husband confirmed he’s falling in love with another woman, ZiJun still forgave him and tried to chase him back.
The best part of divorcing is that ZiJun learned it’s useless to cater for a man by giving up herself.
No matter the huge effort she has spent by wearing fashionable clothes and using makeup every day, in the end, husband left her with a woman who knows how to catch a man’s heart than simply from physical attraction.
When ZiJun works in a department store, LaoJin loves her, he picks up ZiJun and her son on the way to work and home, he cooks dishes and fixes things for ZiJun, and he can do anything for her.
ZiJun feels life getting easier to be with LaoJin, she appreciated his help and invited him for dinner.
LaoJin is a traditional gentleman, ZiJun has no worries if she marries him, but she is no longer a submissive woman who listens to a man, she doesn't feel the freedom to be with LaoJin.
The relationship can't last long, one day, LaoJin wasn’t happy about the clothes she wore when ZiJun attending a party with his friends.
Though LaoJin regretted about what he did, ZiJun decided to leave him because it is not about clothes, the most important thing ZiJun wants to be who she is.
Love is not about a woman changes herself to cater to a man, it’s about you love me, you accept me for who I am.
ZiJun is becoming a charming lady, HanHe is getting interested in her, and changed idea about how a boring woman she was- one only knew how to look after husband and kid.
At the influence of HanHe, ZiJun has become a career woman. She focuses on work and spends most of the time learning new things. She has bright future, and no one can tell how high she will fly.
Even her ex-husband is amazed by ZiJun for being an independent woman. Again she's special on his mind.
A woman should always rely on herself, if a girl marries a rich husband, how lucky she is, but it’s better not to set a goal of a man because it can’t control.
Rather than focus on a man, give him space, do something interesting, in this way, a woman can be more attractive.
For a divorced woman, who cares, you are not inferior; you are independent and have the freedom to be yourself.
That is a story, you might think it’s unrealistic, but in some way, if you wanna experience fulfilled life, you might have to step out of comfort zone to start doing something.
For a high-educated woman, the world is so small if one only knows how to look after the family, you still need to realise your potential.
The only secure a woman can get is to be herself, and do the best;then she won’t be afraid of losing husband because she is independent mentally and financially.
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