So strangely, since last night just before I went to bed, I had started to feel panic and upset, while I really did not know why. Whether it was because my colleagues's sudden invitation for dinner yesterday evening that broke my original plan or it was because of my mom who got a terrible cold but told me she still felt bad despite of several injections, or maybe it was because of one intimate friend's sudden stop during a talk that made me uncomfortable, or it might also be related to the reason that I didn't make it to have a shower for someone's occupation of shower room that let me down. I couldn't make sure what the reason was to have caused my panic, all in all, the fact was I suffered from severe insomnia and I felt very hard while breathing and also uncomfortable in my stomach.&nbsp;<div><br></div><div>Under that condition, I would uncontrollably view about things such as life, family, work, emotion and future &nbsp;in a rather negative way. Yes, for another time, I felt overwhelmed and all had gone into a mess again. I didn't know when I felt asleep, but I knew I woke up early at nearly thirty past three this morning. Even if I was awake, I still failed to survive from negative feelings. It seemed that I was worried about something, my mother's health? the relation with my intimate friend? or the unfinished task in work? &nbsp;I really felt terrible now. All the time, I couldn't help caring about things and people around me, so I would be easily affected once any of them went wrong. I bet there must be a reason for my panic, while I just hoped it was a coincidence and nothing undesirable happened or would happen. Was it ridiculous? I originally thought I was tough enough, omnipotent and undefeatable, while it proved that I was indeed a coward. I never imagined that unknown uncertainties and lacking in sense of safety could&nbsp;</div><div>influnce me so easily. &nbsp;</div><div><br></div><div>There were only two days left for this year, anyway, &nbsp;I only expected everything went smoothly.&nbsp;</div>