Recently one of my female friend called me and somehow we talked about those days in high school years ago. She told me quite a number of girls adored me privately, including herself. But at that time I was so cool, let say cold. That few girls could be close to me. When I heard this , I felt both funny and annoying. Because I am so surprised that so many girls interested in me, but also annoyed that I even didn’t know these girls, I could remember their names, we were in the same class, but I never talked to them., which made them think I was cool and secret. Actually, I was in a bad status both physically and mentally. When I was in high school, I was a dull boy, who studied every day and did nothing else. I was not myself, I was driven by my parents, my teachers and the government. I even had no confidence on myself at all. Now I am in a university, I am being myself and feeling much better. What a naïve and bashful boy I was!

Now that time has passed, my friend and I are totally open to each other. When asked about whether I had fell in love with a girl in my life, I said no in an instant. Cos in my heart, I couldn’t remember any girl who impresses me deeply. “What a deserted emotion”She said. “ That’s because I haven’t met the right one.”I refuted. And I told her If I fell in love with a girl, I would never be engaged in sending massages and making telephone to her. Rather,I would inform the girl at the right time, without any moving words. If she doesn’t show any interests on me, I would give up. She said I was kind of “men sao” which is a Chinese word. I admitted it. “I should have chased after you if I know it earlier.” She said. It seems she was half joking and half serious. Whatever, I don’t care, she has been hysteric like this since I knew her.

 When I talked about a cute girl who I knew recently, she showed great interests in it. Amazingly, I am even not sure about my feeling, why do you want to see her picture? She tried to pry into something more about it but was refused by me. What I want to say is that I would never lose myself for someone, I just want to be “cool”. After I think I understand this girl already, then I would confess to her face to face.