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The past ideals of fame and position have lost their attractions to me. I never envy other people’s possession of wealth, beauties and power any more. I’ m satisfied with my circumstances at present. The only hope I have is to live healthily until a peaceful and natural death. I witnessed the death of father and wife one after another, both suffering long from illness on their deathbeds and needing a full‐time attending. Now it’s mother’s turn. She should be thinking lucky to be tended carefully without lacking anything necessary. But she has been almost always nursing some rage and complaining endlessly regardless of my persuasion. I wish I won’t be so irritable and annoying as mother at the last stage of my life. I long to be able to take care of myself by then because son can be hardly reliable.
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