She felt so suffocated that she locked the door and wandered aimlessly on the campus. It was getting dark and many students on Big Bell Road drove their bikes very rapidly to get to their classes before the bell rang. For this pace of life, Sophie was already very dumb. She felt very tired. She only wanted to escape from everything and walk slowly. 

It was not till she entered the main building and climbed on to the second floor when she perceived that she had reached the classroom door of the Eloquence Class. She walked into a corner of the classroom, and sat down not quietly. Professor Yue was reading a well-known poem by Lu You, Ode To The Plum Blossom:

Outside an inn and beside a broken bridge

A plum is blooming solitary and untended

Grieving herself in the dusk

Laden with loneliness

And swept by wind and rain

Not for the bitter strife of spring glories

She was the envy of other flowers

Fallen mingled with dust

And crushed into the mud

Leaving only the fragrance yet lingers on

As a child Sophie had known this poem. Every time she recited it she felt very pessimistic and hopeless. Now this poem reminded her of the p class and she felt even worse. She thought she was the pitiful plum in Lu You’ s poem, who suffered greatly from the wind and rain of the reality, and could only pity herself in the dusk, incurable. 

But then, another poem amazed her. It was Mao Zedong’ s Ode To The Plum Blossom:

On reading Lu Yu’s Ode to the Plum Blossom, I countered it with the following lines.

Wind and rain escorted Spring’s departure,

Fluttering snow welcomes Spring’s return.

On the ice-clad rock rising high and sheer

A flower blooms sweet and fair.

Sweet and fair, she craves not Spring for herself alone,

To be the harbinger of Spring she is content.

When the mountain flowers are in full bloom

She will smile mingling in their midst.

This poem also wrote about a plum flower, yet they felt so different. The plum in Lu You’ s poem was so spiritless, and the plum in a revolutionalist’ s poem could be so full of life and vigor! The latter plum blossom faced coldness optimistically! If she could live as happily as this plum blossom, her life would not be spoiled! 

At this moment, Sophie tasted the true meaning of the professor. He put the two poems together, so that the students could compare two different kinds of attitudes toward life and different views on the same phenomena. 

High spirited, Sophie raised her cup and sipped some water. Presently, as if the idea had just occurred to her, she remembered something awful. 

In Professor Yue’s class drinking was forbidden. If irritated, he would punish the student severely. Sophie had witnessed many times. 

And so——

 “The girl sitting at the back, stand up! I mean the girl who drank water just now!” 

She did not want to face the whole class with that shame. She could not pluck up courage to endure the professor’s hard words. She did not stand up, bearing the hope in mind that the professor would not lay blame on her behavior. 

But she had not escaped his observation——

 “That student! Stand up!” the professor pointed at Sophie’ s nose with his book. “I say a second time, that student who drank water just now, stand up!!!”

Sophie rose to comply. A fear oppressed her. How she regretted attending to this class! 

 “Why did you not stand up just now, when I called you?”

All the time she fixed her eyes on the ceiling, motionless and silent. She did not want to lower her head, which meant she was fearful of Yue Qun. She dared not look at the professor in the eye also. That could only make her more nervous. 

The professor was in growing anger. 

 “How many times do I warn you? No drinking! No drinking!! Didn’t you hear at all?!”

Sophie hated to be blamed publicly. She got angry. 

 “I was not on purpose!”

“No one drinks except you. Why? To show that you are unique？”

“Why not？!”

“Is it your manner to speak to your professor？!”

Trembling at her own boldness as she spoke, she added, fearing to be rude: “I am sorry, professor. I was not in a good mood just now, please do not be angry with me.”

“Do you think you can do as you like, when you are in a bad mood？Sit down!”

Sophie sat down with a bang. 

Sitting on her seat, Sophie fretted. Why was everyone so cross with her? Displeased, she glared at Professor Yue. 

This stare was like fire to powder. With a great energy he threw away his book. 

“That student, are you dissatisfied, or are you not？I tell you to stand up!!”

That stare, faint as it was, irritated the gentleman, and sealed the culprit’s fate. This time Professor Yue asked Sophie to get out. 

Sophie was just going to leave, when she felt very uncomfortable. She wanted to leave, but her legs refused to carry her. Her mind was in a muddle, not awaring of what she was doing, or the consequences. 

Around her such was the drift of questions: Which department are you in, which class are you in, what’s your name…

Sophie was going to explode, yet she had to answer every question very patiently. At last, the professor pointed at Sophie, saying: “You are an auditor!”

Sophie shocked her head. She had betrayed herself.

The professor gave a slight smile, and stared at Sophie like a detective: “I have known you long ago！As early as several weeks ago I knew you have come to audit my class！”

This struck Sophie as odd. The professor saw a good deal more than she fancied. 

Seeing that Sophie still had no intention to leave, the professor began to drive her off: “I have stressed many times, I do not allow any auditor! Now, please be out!”

 “Why on earth do you ask me to get out?”

 “Are you an undergraduate? You are not? You are from the self-taught Higher Education Examination Institute!”

“I am not.”

 “All right then. I will ask you a question. If you are an undergraduate, you should tell me the right answer. Besides this class, what my other classes have you attended?”

Sophie thought for several minutes, but she was too nervous to remember anything. The classroom was quiet. Every one was staring at her. At last, she could do nothing but shock her head: “I can’t remember anything.”

 “Not anymore?” the professor asked. 

“No.”

The professor gave a smile, waved his hands, asking the students to give the answer together. The students shouted: “We had Military Theory Class in the second term of our freshman year!”

“Military Theory Class! Military Theory Class! The lesson of the Winter Palace! A lesson Sophie would cherish in her mind all her life！All this flashed through her mind in a minute. She was very upset. How could she forget that class? Getting anxious she explained that she had had this class, but who would believe her any more? 

Seeing that Sophie was so fickle, the professor thought she was lying, and he got angry in an instant: “Very good indeed! You are not only an auditor! You are a liar! You are not honest! You are not an undergraduate, then why do you pretend to be an undergraduate!”

Sophie could not put up with this kind of question. She thought it was a kind of insult. She cried out in a fierce tone. 

 “Don’t ask me! How will it matter if I were an undergraduate, and how if I were not an enrolled student! I tell you, you are terribly wrong! I am an undergraduate! Even if I am not an undergraduate, you can not treat me this way!!!”

 “You get out! I do not care if you are an undergraduate, I have no obligation to give classes to such a student as you! It is a waste of my labor! I knew you were an auditor. Get out at once, it is a waste of time to have you standing here! One minute for each one is 45 minutes for a whole class! How can you repay us all for the great losses?!”

“You needn’t worry! This is the last time I come to your class! I will never come back in the future! This is the last time! But today you cannot drive me out! You must be respectful to me!” 

 “You no respect for me! …”

After a few minutes’ quarrel, the professor got tired. Having no way out, he asked Chu Chu and another girl to walk to Sophie, comfort her and ask her to leave at once. Holding Sophie’ s trembling hands, Chu Chu persuaded her for quite a while, asking her to come back first, and she would talk to her privately about this matter. Very carefully, she told Sophie that she too did not agree with the professor’s method of teaching. But the professor at this moment was very angry, and he would be even angrier if Sophie disobeyed him and still stood here. Another girl standing beside her chimed in with Chu Chu. Ten minutes passed. No persuasions could overcome her anger. She merely turned back her face indignantly. 

At last, being too tired to utter anything, the two girls returned to their seats, leaving Sophie standing alone stiff.  

The professor was wheeling around the platform. He murmured: “All my years, till now, I’ve never seen any student of the kind, never, never did I!” 

For a while he gazed at Sophie: “Sophie, can you get involved with your teachers and classmates in your daily life? I mean to get involved totally.”

Sophie shocked her head. She was not clear from which time she had formed a kind of revolting attitude in her heart. It was very hard for her to believe in others, always being ready to fight against hurts from the outside world. She liked to live in a world of imagination, and did not like to face the reality.

 “You should love others and you should love yourself.” The professor said much more softly. “I am sorry this has happened, but I never allow my rules to be infringed, and I never break my word. Miss Sophie, please go away at once.”

Sophie wanted to say something, but could not express herself. 

“If you do not obey me, let us be diplomatic and have a vote. Hands up those who agree this student to leave.”

Every hand went up. Everyone looked at her impatiently, as if saying, you go at once, do not waste our time. Sophie was deeply hurt. 

She made a step forward, but soon withdrew to her original position. 

 “OK, let’s applaud. Let’s encourage this student. She is brave enough to face her own problems.”

This was the most insulting applaud Sophie ever heard. She thought she was a useless person, a hateful person, unlovable and unloving. She looked at the path before her. A short path. A narrow path. The most horrible path in the world. She stood stiff. Everything around her was whirling. Her inner world had already collapsed to pieces. She had no energy to think rationally. To her a single step toward that path meant failure. She did not want to fail. She did not want to retreat like a coward. 

The professor was shaking with anger. 

 “Ok, Ok, you little child fearless of everything. I will call the police at once!”

Full of tears in her eyes, Sophie shouted: “Call whoever you like! I do not fear it! Even if you drive me out of this school! I am already hurt deeply! I do not fear you hurt me again!”

Strangely, when the professor heard this, he did not jump to the ceiling. He walked slowly out of the classroom, closing the door behind him slightly. 

At this moment Sophie felt fearful. She realized she had done something very terrible. She had enraged the professor and was sure she must be driven out of the school. It was very hard for her to be admitted to The Academy and she did not hope that she lost her this way. 

Lowering her head, Sophie was guessing whether she could be driven out of the school, not perceiving that the professor had already walked in, and stood right beside her. When Sophie raised her head, she was rather frightened. Luckily, she did not discover a single policeman behind him, and this relieved her. She had been his auditor since freshman year and for the first time she stood quite close with the professor and talked in such a ridiculous way.  

               

Sophie closed her eyes, getting ready for the professor to drive her out. A soft voice reached her ears: “Sophie, you said you were hurt many times in the past. Can you tell me why?”

Sophie had supposed a million possibilities, but did not think the professor would ask her this question. Tears were welling up in her eyes. Just now the professor did not get out to find so called “police office”, but to consider her secrets in her mind and the reason why she was so obstinate. “He does not seem as severe as he appears to be!” She had loosened the sword in her heart that was to destroy anything. 

She bowed to the professor deeply, saying slowly: “Professor Yue, I am really very, very sorry. I am wrong. I should not drink in class. I am all right now. Now I will get out.” Then she wanted to turn and escape from this classroom, and never come back again. 

 “Please wait a moment!”

Sophie looked back, her eyes were tearful.

 “Sophie, if you believe in me, can you tell me the truth in your mind?” the professor sounded very anxious and loving. 

Silly Sophie could not restrain herself anymore. Tears streaming, she said：“Dear professor, please do not blame me, do not be angry with me. I did not mean to contradict you just now. Before I came to your class I was in a terrible mood, very low-spirited. I even thought of d…”

Her words had frightened Professor Yue and then he withdraw several paces, his face turning pale. Sophie regretted at once. She should not have revealed the truth just now. She had never seen the cool professor so at his wits’ end. 

After all, Professor Yue was definitely not an ordinary man. After a few seconds’ shock, he came up with a solution. He never drove Sophie out, but changed into a very soft and kind tone：“You sit down, please sit down, please.”

Sophie’ s thoughts were in a muddle. She sat down hardly knowing what to do. 

Professor Yue paced quickly to the platform, asked the class to keep quiet, and said：“Just now, when I was quarrelling with Sophie, I noticed one of her sentences ‘I was deeply hurt many times’. So I was very worried. I concluded that there must be some secrets in her mind. I must ask her and make clear the true reason. Once I asked, I was shocked. Sophie said, before she came to my class, she thought of d. Now my students, today for the rest of the class we are not going to read the text. Let’s have a discussion on this problem. Sophie, would you please stand up and tell us what’s on your mind and desperate you so much?” 

All eyes were on her, looking at her softly, full of the warmth of love. Through these pairs of eyes she saw friendly minds worrying for her. There was no barrier in her mind anymore. 

“I was a weak child with little confidence. I lived in an abnormal family in which I had to struggle between love and hate. I saw my M chasing my F holding a cleaver. I saw her throwing my F’s shirt in the toilet, and my pet away. My M always scolded me. She said I was worse than a dog, and too ashamed to live in this world. 

 “Does your M really want you to die?”

This sentence had awakened her. Now she understood that she was too innocent to tell truth from her false impressions. 

The class was very quiet. The professor had approached her. 

“Who had tolerated everything silently without ever complaining, who had propped your spiritual world, and who had encouraged you to get to college?”

 “My father.”

“You have a good father.”

She kept back her tears. She was too proud to cry. 

 “Is that all? If some other memories confuse you, speak out in my class. Be open in my class.”

Sophie looked at the professor in the eye, recalling: “At primary school, I was always the most stupid student. Everyone looked down upon me. Once I did not pass the exam and my teacher asked me to walk around the classroom showing my paper to everyone…”

The professor sized Sophie up smilingly：“When you grew up you became a college student. You are not stupid. Now let’s applaud for this clever child!”

          

This was the most encouraging applaud Sophie ever heard. Especially for her. She cried again, this time she was deeply moved. 

“Do not cry, my child. As long as you smile, you will live in spring forever!”

She smiled, though tears were flowing on her cheeks. 

 “Look! How beautiful she smiles! Like a plum flower, standing elegantly in the snow and ice. 

The class applauded. They knew the wounded bird had found a warm nest. 

A relieved smile flickered on Professor Yue’s face: “Sophie, will you come here next time?”       

Sophie broke out smiling. She gave a silent nod. 

“Was it you that declare just now who would never come any more?” 

 “Professor Yue, I am desperately sorry. I wish you wouldn’t take it so hard.” A red flushed in Sophie’ s cheeks. 

“As a professor, I should not have hurt Sophie’ s delicacy publicly. Now, I sincerely apologize to Sophie.” Then he bowed to the class. 

If there was a fissure on the ground, Sophie would sure be ashamed enough to creep into it. “How he overwhelms me!” she thought. 

And Sophie was greatly moved to see Professor Yue asking Chu Chu to add Sophie’ s name to his name list, and accepting Sophie as a formal student of his Eloquence Class. She had become a member of the family, and did not have to audit the class like a thief.