Abraham Lincoln once said: “Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be”. If I read this sentence two years ago, I might shrug it off: Another sentence is beautiful written but actually meaningless.

How could happiness be merely a choice? If it is, everyone would choose to be happy and the world would be a paradise. But the truth is, everyday countless people died of heart-breaking and the world, as always, is nothing but a battle field that demands your sweat and blood to get what you want---I mean, if you are lucky.

People are certainly happy for a reason or reasons: like fortune, power, fame, falling in love, being recognized and valued, or at least, being healthy.

And then, life has taught me in her typically ironical way that I just mixed pleasures with happiness. All of those above-mentioned can only bring people fleeting pleasures. Pleasure never lasts like happiness. It fades away as quickly as snapping a finger. And being happy is actually an ability.

Otherwise, the old version of me must be so much happier than the new version of me. Me from two years ago has so many reasons to be happier: She still has a job, the hospital bill hasn’t burned a hole in her savings, she doesn’t need to face up with the biggest change in her life, and most of all, she is healthy, like a cancel-free healthy.

Meanwhile, Me from the present has so many reasons not to be happy: jobless, shapeless, endless treatments accompanied with endless sufferings. Just take today as an example, do you know how many times I rushed into the restroom? Diarrhea, a side effect of one drug I’m taking. It suddenly becomes so severe that I have to spend a whole morning in the clinic to take drips. and for god’s sake, with that fragile body I have to prepare myself for the biggest challenge I’ve ever experienced!

The old me definitely should be happier, must be happier. But to everyone’s surprise (include myself), I’m happier than before. The old me worried too much, from job to family, from her weight to her makeup. She is so restless that she actually has no time and less ability to be happy. Now I’ve be taught to make the best of the situation. I am forced to view the world with the positive mindset (because if not, I can’t survive a single day), and most of all, I’ve learnt to live in the moment, to appreciate little miracles in life--the beautiful sunrise in the morning, the wild cat wandering around the community, my husband’s surprisingly tolerance and patience for me---as for now, what I appreciate the most, is finally my stomach stopped running like a boiling water—thank god！！！

However crazy it sounds to be, happiness is nothing but your own choice. Time has it’s own pace, whether you are happy or not, it moves forward anyway. Its up to you to decide what to fill each minute, each hour, each day. Live every minute to the fullest, try your best fill the time with happy memories and then you’ll be fine.