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Hot 1746 views. 2021-10-20 11:32 |Individual Classification:Daily Life

Pessimistic and optimistic; determined and indecisive; strong and week; organized and messy; lazy and hard-working, all of these opposite traits can be found in one person—Me. Perhaps I have split-personalities and sometimes I do feel like that there are two persons living inside my body and they are struggling a lot to take control.


For example, yesterday obviously it’s the Lazy part of me that takes the control. I spent most of time getting sucked into a junk novel. It tells a story that one man transfers from one world to another, changing some loser’s life into a great success. There was nothing that I could learn from it and I still got a lot of things need to be done: exercising, English learning, preparing a resume for my husband, taking computer course….


There were times that I could feel my hard-working part screaming inside, protesting in ever fiber: Stop! Stop! Stop! Pull yourself together to do something really counts!


My lazy part stifled her voice and snapped back: What’s the point? Your stomach is burning, small cuts and blisters are full of your feet. You have to stop taking bills and how many days you still have? Your life sucks and what’s wrong to escape into a story where health, success, wealth and fame is so damn easy to get?


This time my lazy part hits the score. However, at the end of the day I was seized by a wave of uneasiness. My body got stiffer due to lack of stretch. My tongue got tangled when I tried to speak English. The fact that another day has passed with nothing to be done suddenly became suffocating and unbearable.


So today, I got up early. With my hands trembling so much, I took my pills on time. I did one hour’s yoga to give my body a good stretch. I finished open-language course and wrote this article---it’s just 11 o’clock by now.


To be honest, I don’t know which one is my true self---perhaps the “bad” part. Sometimes I do feel that I am just acting a part. For one reason or another, I have to step into the role of Better Version of Me: being positive, diligent and sweet. Who knows what kind of person I would become if I shed all layers of pretenses, back into the one I was behind the façade.





Post comment Comment (1 replies)

Reply davidjuyong 2021-10-21 10:07
Hello ,nice to see you again !

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