I was preparing to be transplanted from this August. I went to the hospital every afternoon by bus because it wad too hard to park near the hospital.I felt so tired but I thought I had hope. I could have my babe soon. Dr told me that I could not be transplanted according to the data of my body yesterday. I felt SO disappointed . Actually I didnt know how I went back to my home. My friend comforted me and blessed me.I also thought I could feel better in the next day.

  This morning I woke up at 7:00 and planned to run for one hour.I Do think I can have a new start for my next life.But when I ran into the supermarket and wanted to buy some breakfast,I knew I was wrong.I couldnt smile,couldnt eat,couldnt pick anything.I had no interest to anything.

  I thought about my life recently .I cant denyed that I have made my work,my feeling and my life messy .Everybody knows me will think I am a hopeful girl,but actually I am a gloomy one.When I am sad,I couldnt tell others my real thought,I only will hide myself into a dark corner.It seems that I have locked myself into darkness again.

  I want to say sth to sb,I never sleep with my friend.I did it because I like you....or maybe I love you.Though I cant tell u.So when you said:your friendship is worthless,you hurt me deeply.Yes,maybe I wont tell you for ever,but it does make us estarged more and more....and so do we.