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Every time when I feel like thirsty to writting, it's the time of confusing and wandering. Then I'm back here, writting in the unfamiliar language to hold back some kind of unpleasant compulsion. I know this is not the usual way of using this kind of web.
Today's story is complicated to narrate, and I'll omit those details while trying to present the contradic point as clearly as possible.
I've been an graduate atudent smoothly and got a professor. There're lots of stories to remember through the whole process of finding her and get alone with her. Currently, the problem is, I cannot get alone well with her.
This is just a general, underlying conclusion in my heart, not the shown appearance. I've just begun working with her informally(it's summer holiday before going to hospital now), and we can work smoothly on the Internet without large problem. The problem is, I feel so tired to do what ever she said and say yes only to whatever she instructed. The work we just finished today is a paper publishing discussion. I 'll stop here for she repeatedly asked me to keep secret of all the information she gave me.
She seems to be a good but strict teacher the first converstation when she was care about my career plan(my major is doctor). She works so hard that it's always after 21:00 when I receive a message from her. It seems that no day off is a matter of course in this occupation and ask student to work at half past eleven at night is not a sorry thing at all. There's one thing to mention: the research is not my business as well as she asked me to do the work in the name of study. Even if i got the time to do it, it doesn't mean i was consent with her.
Then I thought, as a professor she has low work efficiency. I admit that I have kind of yearning before doing the job of research though I want to be a doctor not a reseacher. She was not the typical kind of scientist in my mind whose are strict, stubborn, focusing on work, strict on student's work but forget their character. She said again and again "You are uncapable of speaking skill" to me, and focusing on the respond letter's polite format very much. Meanwhile, she asked me to revise the paper for the first time and do not read what i wrote when do it herself. Of course I know it was the first time that i do it, the work could be bad.
I had a letter from reviewer to follow when we do the work. There was one point which I thought the reviewer is wrong and kept the original statement. I get to know that she never read when I find she wrote "we rewrite as your said" on the respond letter. When she wrote this in the screen in front of me, I kept silence for i've already finished my part. The interesting thing is, after that another student in this work point that out. Then she prolonged the worktime three days to study that tiny point which was apparently the reviewer's fault. It's so paintful to follow her soliloquies(自言自语) at 23:00 after waiting for two hours for the nonsense online meeting notification. Afterall, the papar is not mine and I'm a fresh confronted to her. As a result, I can't follow my professer's researching theory this time. Thanks god I'm not a researcher but a doctor.
The relationship between a graduate student and teacher is complicated as i know. I tried to find related messages online and did find some, but all not useful. Generally i'm a hard student. I believe I can deal with this in the following years, for there's no requirement that the two must become friends.
Last, there is just one thing to complain: Why did i agree with her at the very beginning that i 'm not good at chatting is a problem? We are adults and she is the teacher of subject, how could she try to remodel my characteristics?
PS.I'll change my english immediately.
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Post comment Comment (2 replies)
- Reply teadrinking
- It is kind of a way to write something to release. And in English, we can have another method to free emotion.
Your teacher like many others is doing her job with her students to work with. And in the name of her reputation and position, all the work is to be ascribed to her achievement. This happens among college studies, while a good professor can guide students to be a master who can study and do research independently and later to be a qualified researcher.
In the final, you can be a good doctor. Come on.
- Reply Sophia.JIANG
- Thank you for your kindness.
