How time flies, the 2015 is coming to an end. Within this year, I came across a lot of ups and downs. But there was one thing worth celebrating-I had a steady job. Undoubtedly, like other office workers, I also had my own salary every month. Though not too much, it was enough to maintain my family's daily expenses. And that was really a proud thing that I ever did for my family. While, for myself , I found I had new upset. Unlike the life in postgraduate school, the new role made my life no longer simple. Before, I could pay most of my attention to my study, and I would work overnights for many days just to accomplish my thesis. However, when I got the job, when I started to live better and more relaxed, I couldn't be concentrated any more, I was always distracted by the trifles. The so-called trifles can be ascribed to three relevant aspects: (1) about my job: I was very disappointed at my team, team leader, even the department leaders. By the few months' observation and connection, I gradually found my team was not united at all, it seemed that they came to work was a task. And then my team leader, a young man, I may not be convinced by his ability. I could understand that everyone had the chance to learn, and it was no exception for a leader, but I couldn't bear a leader withiout a clear mind. He alwasys asked us to mechanically process lots of statistical data and draw maps, when we asked him what they were for, he could not give a very convincing reason. So we were ocuupied every day, but we didn't know what we work for and what result we wanted to get. For my department leaders, I had to say, they gave me a lesson that not every word they said were trustworthy. When I first came to work, they told me young workers were very welcomed and they would give us many chances to learn new things, new skills, and they had the confidence we could be cultivated into very outstanding and comprehensive workers in a year or so. So far, I had been working for more than four months, those people just let me stay here under my team leader's charge. Sometimes I felt I was a mechine working for them. Someday, I picked up my courage to have a talk with my department leader, his general meaning was I should listen to my team leader's words. Such situation let me down, and I didn't even know where I was heading; (2) about my family: my father passed away at the beggining of 2014, this was the last thing I wanted to mention in front of others, because I didn't want to be a poor person. He was the most considerate and understanding father in my world, whenever I had difficulties, he was always the first to comfort me. While now, he wasn't there anymore, it seemed there was a emptiness in my heart. I needed someone to talk with, but I couldn't find one. My mom was busy taking care of my sister's baby, when I called her, she seemed did not focus on what I said. My sister and my younger brother both had their own family, each time I called them. I felt I was disrupting their life. because they had their own things to handle; (3) about my emotion: many friends had been married for my age, while I was still single. I admired their life so much. Whenever I saw someone uploaded sweet photoes and called the other one to complain something, I felt so lonely and painful. To tell the truth, I really needed someone be there for me when I felt hurt and sad. The man in my mind was a little too perfect, and it deserved to be a fantasy. It seemed that I was a poor cinderella without smart brain and well background,  I didn't have the qualification to meet that perfect guy. These above things had disturbed me so long. While today, I was refreshed, those were not worth I paying attention to. If I was affected by them, it only suggested I wanted to find an excuse for my laziness and I was tempeted by other things. I shouldn't live in that way, I was so regretful that I wasted so much time on unworthy things. With those time, I could do a lot things. From now on, I should come back on my own track, concentratedly doing the right thing with a simple mind, only in that way, I can be better so that I can regain my confidence and pleasure.