“Yes.” I replied, but my mind went blank for a second.

           These days, Mr. Ho gave me “less” lessons but more smiles. Smiles of appreciation: I can tell. I know I begin to win his recognition. He tries to give every opportunity to me to grow up. This time, as Amy asked a leave for tomorrow morning, now he was asking Amy to pass an important client to me for a moment. This recognition, as you know, is what I pursue. Now these smiles, this recognition is an exciting event, for that means all what I have pain begin to turn to gain. But at the same time, I am afraid, afraid that I can never rid myself of continuous job. Mr. Ho is very strict and he requires every employee’s 100% devotion. Do it well or leave us now: that his words. Putting my Japanese, my drawing, my diary-editing, my travelling plan aside, I have to devote all the time to working? I shrank and shrink with this idea.  

           “From these weekly journals, I can tell you are a minded girl. And I like your passions towards this job. Keep them. I look forward to your growth.” After two-hour meeting with me alone, Mr. Ho said.

           I smiled a smile as a response and left the office.

           I know I can do this work well (everyone can perform well if he sets his mind to do that), but sometimes I just wonder, will I choose to do it well…