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“ do you think he does deserve you?”
“ I think you are better than them around your age people.”
“ if he can’t provide some things with you, what can you do ?
“ what if the house can’t be decorated when they are ready to get married?”
“has he said when to get ready for the new house”
“ do you feel happy when you are told to get married in the near future?”
“maybe you can get to the city where he is working.”
“ aren’t you afraid that you may not find a better job when you quit the present job”
…
They asked me above questions. Actually, when I was asked, I was really feeling awful. In the eyes of people, I’m too good for him. From my inner world, I do thing so.
“ can I very very very love her so that I can totally ignore his condition and family background?”
I know I can’t.
In fact, I wish I can become the one who love him unconditionally, so I can’t feel metal agony.
When I ask him do you think of the marriage life? He says our marriage will be very happy, even though we can’t live together for the time being. He told me every time he was thinking of me, he would feel full of energy working hard in a big city. But we have to face the fact that we can’t live with each other every day after getting married in a short time. For me, I’m not so confident in him and me. I think I may not have the ability to deal with and shoulder everything when i'm alone at home. I’m not sure if I can do that like others who can do things well. I know my disadvantage that I often think of the obstacles in front of us and pay more attention to them, so I am often bothered by them and those make me in a bad mood. I really abhor this kind of me. I have been putting my heart into the unimportant things. What counts is that we are willing to fight for each other and we can get along well. I have wasted a lot of time on the unnecessary things and now i no longer do it like before. Time is precious and important, so is study.
Post comment Comment (2 replies)
- Reply sunnyv
- Marriage is a life long commitment, therefore, deep thinking, considerations and important decisions have to be made. Nobody is perfect and there are actually no perfect marriages. Marriage itself is actually a calculated risk. You never know what can happen after marriage.
According to statistics, happy and successful marriages come true when one of the partners are less gifted than the other one. This gives opportunities to love, care and help the other. It is better when the male is more successful than the female because of social opinion that a man is supposed to lead the family. However, when two are powerful and elite, the marriage would be under constant pressure as each of the partners would have an overblown ego and compete with each other. The result would be frequent arguments threatening the marriage. The new matrimonial home must be ready in time as the new home signifies a new start and a new married life. Don't overlook this home otherwise you would feel unsettled or jittery from the beginning.
In your case, it seems you have better qualities than him, so you are
in a better position to decide whether the marriage is viable. The main concern would be whether you truly loves each other, ready to face all the challenges that would arise, serious about the future, willing to work towards a happy future, able to withstand all the cold words from others and committed to a life long relationship. Indeed there are risks, so you should think carefully before committing yourself and once you commit yourself, don't ever look back.
On the other hand, time waits for nobody, time passes quickly and we ourselves would lost our own qualities and advantages. You never know whether another one would be better than him. You would have to make a firm decision.
Love is blind, but marriage is an eye-opener. Wish you the best.
- Reply Candy.liu
- Different people have different opinion on the marriage. I think it mostly depends on the two guys, the male and the female who want to marry each other really. For house, car, money, and other things, i think as long as we work hard together, the dream will come true. Maybe i think it in simple way. Haha.
