Recently I have realized that I’m often on the fence. Because of that, I feel kind of tiredness and am beginning to hate myself. I have no idea why and wonder if I can get out of this state as soon as possible, especially when I am faced with some simple things; my heart is being torn in two different directions.

For example, I was about to bring my luggage from my new house to mom’s house, when the sky seemed to rain, at this moment, I was considering whether I could go or not at once. If it was raining, it would be not convenient for me to take it. So let me wait until the rain stopped. After several minutes, it didn’t rain and the sky was becoming clear again. Then I was ready to go out but the other voice appeared, saying that it would not be a nice decision because there might not be any bus on the street at this moment.

Now I was standing at the crossing, and reckoning whether to go nor not. Two different choices made me crazy and in a dilemma, no matter which way I choose, I seemed to find the reason for each one.

From time to time, I find it easy to make a decision on something like whether to watch TV or to read books. Now matter what I choose, I hardly put my heart into one thing at a time.

Why I become such a person? It’s hard for me to accept what I ‘m like now. I hope to be the one who once makes a decision, and isn’t afraid to be overtaken by the misgivings and fears, just go for it!

Now I know my problem but how to get over the annoying habit.