This year has been a year of fruition--realization of childhood dreams, betrayal of confidantes, trials of psychological torment, cost of gradual maturity, and foremost, the discovery of my true love. Everything appears really blissful and amazingly accordant as the natural path of a girl who's growing up. People mature through pains. Step by step, I am walking forward on the seemingly right track.

Am I still myself? Am I doing the right thing? Am I right? Am I what I used to be? I get confused and doubt about myself once and again. I should be happy coz I have already got the happiness desired by millions of girls--a loving boyfriend, a stable job, and a peaceful life? I get no chance to sigh, to complain, or to regret. Sometimes, I get really fed up with this hectic mundane life where everyone is struggling so hard to make a living. Why is everyone competing with each other to grab a job of no good? Why is everyone falling for  rumors and bitching around? Why is everyone walking so fast that they miss fascinating landscapes along the way all the time? I better take it slow and start anew, or simply start it over again.

Somewhere at the bottom of my heart, I know there's still a place where no one can reach for. It's a black-box in which many secrets are stifled and buried; it's the tomb of my first affection, my purest friendship, my commitment to someone really special. Wounds do get cured with the lapse of time, while memories cannot be wiped out from one's mind. I do need to thank my beloved and those who are always there for me when I need them most. I am a lucky piece of shit.lolz....

Thank you, my family, my boyfriend, my companions, and all of those who still remember me. What else can I expect from someone who has no part of my life? I am the only one who's captaining my own boat. It might become a runaway raft; it might turn out a hands-off ship; it might be a humble canoe en route to the destination of excellence. Others have no control over my life except myself. The road not taken might be a tough journey full of obstacles and opportunities, but as long as I go with the flow and feel content with my lot, I can always be a stressless, cheerful and freelancer-like person that I used to dream about. Thank you and goodbye, my heart-rending and memorable bygones. Goodbye, 2010. Hey, I am ready, 2011 with the toughness and tests ahead. Happy New Year!

Freda

2010.31