I was a rational girl who coldly witnessed the surroudings and deduced the consequence in complicity with conditions, characters and circulations to mutually comfirm the expected mindset.

    Needless to say, i set the barrier and to enclose my own world in which i discontented with my substance, career and had a big dream that beyond my stage. So i may smile but not for a long time and repeatedly back my enclosure to taste the reality dismay or seldom happy from the illusion.

    When i was in hospital, thanks for the doctor`s right treatment to alleviate the sickness and the main task i undertook was hanging brine in which period i could observe the different world.

    As what i mentioned before due to red pocket money that time, i had the privilege of receving prior or superior treatment without going after the doctor to get update treatment information or formula. I had no room to worry about my treatment process which had been forseen or told by my doctor when others at a loss in the same room. When the others tried to show friendly to the resident doctor, i was keeping doing sth as if he was not there cau my doctor was his direct leader and no one could easily diagnose my sickness without second thought due to later the better turn.

    Staying in the hospital and at least 6 hour hanging brine at least a day, i had no chance to walking around at ramdom and no other way time killing so i closely kept a close eye on others with this initial motive which shockingly mutilated my once built narrowed enclosure.

    I found a couple who must have been manual workers their suntanned skin and country dress comfirmed my reasoning who i define them may suffer more asperity in this law of the jungle society. What shocked me was they had good attitude to life satisfied with what they got as in my eye it is just little far more being satisified. What impressed me was their big smile purely shining their face which still remained in my mind and how could that instantly crumble my hardened heart i had no idea but it was that time i decided to put down my stubbornness and being nice to surroundings.

    With this and doctor good care--can you imagine when you are discharged and called the doctor for checking medicine dose, yes, what i got was not tablet pill it was injection and the doctor emphsised was not the usage it was "don`t break your fingers it wil be hurtful" and repeated twice or three times as a preface then the usage later which hit my heart cau like i was the one under his wings which i wanted to last but unrealistic. What i can express all is you are my dear doctor forever no matter what could be in the future keeping in touch or vague contact you still have a special room in my heart.