It's like asking "how are you" has become the daily routine of my life ever since I moved to live
with an American girl from UNC, with twelve more yankees living on the same floor. Wherever and
whenever we bomb into each other, it can't be more frequent than utter a "how are you". But do I
really care about how they are or do they really care about how I am? I'm afraid "No",which I can
explicitly deduce from the detached answer "Good, yourself?" The reason why the answerer responds
simply with a word or two is distinctly that they quite understand the asker doesn't bother to get
the true answer the least bit, and it's the same case when they become the askers.
I guess everybody knows that behind "how are you" there exists "hypocrisy" or
"insencerity", but why don't we unmask the hypocrite immediately just like Loss (洛 丝),
the character in an American sitcom Fled , who once enquired Fled by asking "do you
really care about how I am or you are just asking?". Haven't anticipated that Loss was this
serious, Fled got speechless all of sudden and finally squeezed out a few words, "Sorry,
I was just asking". I did not know for sure how many of us can act as straightforward as
Loss, but it might be universally acknowledged that it is no one but wants to be put into
the embarrassed plight like Fled. Given the above situation, that we do not want to lay bare
the hypocrite seems plausible.
But let me make it clear here, what I was talking about only holds water when you are
dealing with some nodding acquaintance, excluding those who you have penciled on your
pal list. For the latter category, you have the rights and responsibility to dig out more even
though sometimes they deliver the same simple "Good" to you when asked, because of
that they have secret sorrow which they can not tell you directly. Taking an episode
in Desperate Housewives as an example, one morning Linnet (丽奈特)came across her neighbour friend Alice(爱丽 丝). When asked "how are you", Alice hurried to give a simple word "Good" with a
face of qualm. Linnet easily sensed there must be something wrong with Alice, but
out of sheer inertial thinking she still gave up asking more. Afterwards, it turned
out that Alice hanged herself at home that morning because she just received a
blackmail, leaving Linnet feeling guilty for all the days which laid ahead.
Is that heartbroken?
It may not strike chord among you because of my lack of dramatic description,
but please note this: learn cordially to care about people around you regardless
of their gender, age or status. It is not that you may become how gracious because
of this, but that when you are really in hot water there are pairs of hearty and
concerned eyes watching ya and ready to deliver a sincere greeting "how are you".
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