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You owe me the money
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Have you ever met the situation when a friend came to you and wanted to borrow some money? He might say that he was in a matter of emergency or forgot to take wallet while came up with an idea of buying snacks. Weeks or months later, it is really awkward to ask money back if he does not positively indicate to return.
This case happens to almost every one of us. Usually the amount of money is not that big, it could be just several bucks. There are also some cases with a large sum of money. It is no doubt we offer cashes to a friend who is really in the need of help. While it will be a problem if he does not pay back in time or even does not have any clue.
You definitely feel uneasy and consider if there is a must to do something. Probably you again go back to the point where you are at the restless torrent. Such a problem costs bravery to inform the guy. The anxiety goes in line with amount of money you lent. The more you lent, the worse you suffer.
All comes down in the cool mind. There is no need worrying about what he reacts. You are the owner. Sometimes we are sunk into the stagnant water of embarrassment concerning if the connection would be influenced.
A good friend would not cost us much time to risk the relation. So you are never anxious about he won’t return back in time. If he really forgets about that, never mind. You just tell him. He will appreciate for your straightforwardness. If he deliberately does not intend to pay back and shields him under the cover of morality, you just break it down and tell him. No need to maintain such an ineffective relation. You are not supposed to be shameful but him.
Another suggestion: Do not lend too much if you really have to. Even if you meet those who do not keep promise, you can reduce the loss to the minimum. When you are asked for a big money, the best way is to say no. This is the only effective way to protect yourselves and also the nice rejection to stay away from those with intentional motive.
Next time, you meet the guy and just say: “Hey, buddy, you owe me the money.”
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Post comment Comment (6 replies)
- Reply IMNONARCISSUS
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Sometimes to be direct might be the best solution to this kind of problems
- Reply sunnyv
- Well, you are right to say most of us have friends who have borrowed money from us and pretend to have brain failure. They can have all sorts of reasons or emergencies. They can be very friendly or even pitiful at the time of borrowing. When the time comes for return of the loan he becomes another person. Some would even refuse to talk. In fact, we can lost good friends by lending money to them. It is easy to borrow but hard to return.
However, it is very difficult to be too heartless or cold when it is a good old friend. It is hard to refuse and we don't want to lose a good friend by turning him down coldly. My best friend once borrowed money from me some years ago and promised to return to me within 3 months. After three months, he stopped the contact and when I called him, there was no answer. 2 years later I wrote a letter to him telling him that he owe me that money and stopped contact with me. I wrote that you do not have to return that money if you have difficulty but eventually you will have to return that to me when you can. If you choose to lose this friend, you can continue to disconnect with me, but I feel our friendship is worth much more than that. Silence for half year then he calls and say sorry and he want to return the money to me. I told him that means he treasure our friendship. He remains my best friend.
- Reply teadrinking
- Um, just do it without worry. Sometimes it would be much better to solve such an issue.
IMNONARCISSUS:
Sometimes to be direct might be the best solution to this kind of problems
- Reply teadrinking
- I wrote something I met and found. When I observe those stories happened around me and from friends, I learn and gain the knowledge to be better with friends. Knowing how to deal with relation between people and how to protect myself and the profits of my family. That is the basic need I have to do so. It also work on everyone.
sunnyv: Well, you are right to say most of us have friends who have borrowed money from us and pretend to have brain failure. They can have all sorts of reaso ...
It is really ok when those who do not return it anymore, at least it teaches us a lesson. Though the cost is painful, not just for the amount of money, but also the loss of friendship. Actually such a relation lies in if we can truly cherish it or not. It is deserved to own as long as we envisage as gratitude and thankfulness, treat it as the best precious we can seize. Otherwise, it is not worth of having the friendship.
The right one could be the best proper people though there are only few guys around we can have, or just even none exists. I think we have to take everything we have done.
- Reply sunnyv
- Actually, through your experience, I realized that my friends are just like everyone else, like they are on our contact list but seldom contact and some contact for beneficial purposes, while others remain inactive. Only very few can be counted as trustworthy or reliable friends. That shows that it is trend for friendships in the materialistic times. Your comments made it easier for me to accept the carefree and uncaring attitude of some of my friends.
teadrinking: I wrote something I met and found. When I observe those stories happened around me and from friends, I learn and gain the knowledge to be better with ...
- Reply teadrinking
sunnyv: Actually, through your experience, I realized that my friends are just like everyone else, like they are on our contact list but seldom contact and so ...
No matter how many friends we have on the list, actually we only have few to contact. Those few ones are choosed, tested and proved to be deserved to maintain a stable relation.
