i was constantly struck by some nebulous and intangible feeling that i can't articulate but have to give vent to.and when i was unfortunately seized by a paroxysm of such sentiment, i would be most thankful that at least verbalizing them in an exotic language is accessible. even few people bother to grasp what i mean,and maybe i was the only audience.
but i really get a kick out of such boring stuff.
born to be a nondescript girl with no outstanding features, i am the sort of person one would never notice in a crowd. so it can't be more natural that i gradually descend to a narcissist, indulging in my own despair rather than preening gloatingly.
this is a vicious circle,the more i feed this feeling, the more melancholy i become,then i understand sadness is a ghost, just like all the ghosts in the world, it is insatiable.
so it's high time i changed my atitude, instead of spoiling it, i choose to neglect it, when it learns that he is no longer my favorite company, then it will starve to death.