maybe in this world, the most elusive knowledge is self-knowledge, i fail to picture my psyche for all thoses years,it just like an insubstantial spirit inside keeping me restive day and night.i don't quite know what it expect from me precisely, but at least one thing is clear,that is it wants change, any kind of change will count.i just can remain what i am,cause part of me inside is dying from being stagnant for too long.