everyday i stayed at home doing nothing.i doubt what he is doing now. but he hates my interrupting him while he is working. i wish his contact with me actively. what is he doing? i picked up a book but my mind was blank. i really need his love all the time. why didn't he phone me? is he busy that way? does he still care for our emotion? oh my god please give me a hint and suggestion what should i do . i will phone him. no. i shouldn't be that active,which makes him overvalue me. but i can't help missing him. i want him that much. he told me on the line that he had much work at the end of the year and he can't accompany me just like my request.  he can't meet my demand now .oh, how angry i am. what does he mean? he is my dear but he wouldn't like me to be with me ? god save me!