I was very busy last week so that I didn’t write anything. Because of the math class had been canceled, so I have some leisure time today’s afternoon.

Half year had past in my college life, I realized that I have got close to the reality. I don’t whether the change good for me. On the one hand, It makes me study much hard than before. On the other hand, it also makes me be afraid of seeking for the love which belongs to me.

I have read some books about philosophy and I begin to use the knowledge about philosophy to analyze some questions. Maybe college life changed my value about life in the half past year.

Someone says that seek your love no matter how weak you are. I really respect the people who were did like that. But I can’t, I must care of my future, I must make me strong enough so that I can grasp anyone I love. But time is waiting for no man. I am twenty years old. I must hurry up.

I don’t know whether my choice right or not. maybe ten years later I will regret for it. But now I think it is the only way I can choose.

What I am now. I am scaring to think my childhood’s dream. I lose it forever. I know I can’t realize it in my rest life. It only can be exist in my heart. what a pity.

It seems that I am a little negative. But to some extent, I really should back the reality. I must recognize what is my real life.