My mood is so complicated now, I just give up the continuing study of tech in IT. Just three weeks ago, I downloaded many books about my professional, such as html5, big data, cloud computing. I was intended to pay much sweat to study them next year, suddenly, I give it up, I don't know if my decision was right, but I know what I am about to study is great, so wonderful, like a star that I can't touch it, I can't touch it, for my environment, for my age, I am not a perfect one in this field, what a sad thing, what on earth belongs to me, I am thinking what's mine, I am still thinking, I am still have nothing.