I always told myself to keep a lake of still water in my heart, but it was really hard to do it. Even though I could keep it, there were always stones falling into it to make myself uneasy.

I couldn’t stop others throwing stones and had to improve myself. I’d better freeze my heart lake so that stones weren’t able to break the peace of it. You had no power to prevent others from breaking your body, but nobody had the power to break your soul except yourself. Your soul would become as hard as diamond if you liked, but no everybody had the ability.

No matter who you were, where you were, if you had a hard soul, you would become a real person, nobody could break easily. If you didn’t have a lake of still water in your heart, you would be easily influenced by trifle.

Gradually, I formed the habit of writing something, for what? Nothing. I just liked it. Every day I wanted to write something, these days, I were really busy, so some days I didn’t even have time to write a short article, however, I would try my best to write.

Time goes by so quickly. It was near the end of 2011. For the whole year, I did nothing and simply wasted the year of 2011. So what? Regret? No use, I didn’t want to regret to waste more time. The past was past, the future wasn’t come yet. I only needed to care about now. Now I was writing here and that was the only real thing. The past was past even though I liked history so much. The future, who knew it? Even Kim Jong II couldn’t predict his death, not even to say us common people. So I never made long plan, no use. I only made plan for current days.

I always told myself to be happy, but sometimes, I really didn’t have much things for me to feel happy. Bad mood would run all over me without end. The most urgent thing I needed to achieve was success, I had to do something successful to prove that I was capable. I didn’t want to be a person without any professional skill.

I feared nothing and worried about nothing, only thought sometimes why I was so useless and achieved nothing. No matter how, I had to go on my days. Once I heard of a kind of bird without claws, so all its life, it had to fly forward without stop, nothing except death could stop it. I thought I was just this kind of bird. I must work hard or else I would be killed by boringness. Maybe I only used to hard life. I hated hard life, but didn’t have the mood to enjoy easy life. After writing for a while, even I myself didn’t know what I was talking about. Let’s call a day.