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The fear of opinion from others

718 views. 2012-5-8 18:01 |

 It was after my starting of work in this seemingly remote country that by chance I discovered Dioenglish, a platform on which we could publish whatever occurs to our mind and anything that we want to share from a genuine and voluntary impulsion. It was indeed an amazing experience that greatly broadened my otherwise lonely and mechanic routine life. Even better, I made some congenial friends, whom would be very difficult if not possible to meet in my immediate circle of life. The profound joy derived from communicating with people of same interest and similar thinking elevated my thinking to a higher level of horizon.

 

It occurred to me, however, that how unlucky of those young people who are actually excellent but holding different views of life than people of their immediate circle of life, suffered and depressed from the fear of opinions from others which in many cases are mean, narrow and ignorant. They are unlucky because of their remote location with no modern technology and no chance of meeting congenial people. they are afraid to air any of their real thinking for fear of being in serious trouble from his parents, relatives or neighbors. What make things even worse is that they started to believe that the opinions of his immediate circle are representative of the world. They are so unlucky! Only if they could have the chance to see the world at large, only if they could have access to website like dioenglish, their life would be so much different and so much happier.

 

Opinion from others, in my mind, shall not be the dominating force in our life. So long as the people are not deliberately in defiant of the public opinion, so long as the people have reached the age of discretion, they have the right to their own choice and if necessary to their own mistakes. On the other hand, people should be more tolerable to those minority with different thinking from their owns’. In many cases, it is these very different thinking that drove the society advancing.

 

I wish everyone of my friend and anyone who has the chance to read this blog could be free from the fear of opinions from others.

Post comment Comment (28 replies)

Reply KaeLee 2012-5-8 18:14
i agree but its easier said than done. things are more complicated in the real world.
Reply Richardren 2012-5-8 18:19
KaeLee: i agree but its easier said than done. things are more complicated in the real world.
you are right, it is not easy. But i guess a better philosophy of life plus some mental discipline would at least improve the situation a lit.
Reply sunnyv 2012-5-8 20:03
You seem to have an accurate idea of the realities of life. You also seem to balance your life properly despite living in a remote area. Sometimes, back to the basics is not too bad because it would give you the chance to see life without the intervention of modern technology and the dailiy hustle and bustle of city life. According to what you said, I believe you would have no problem facing challenging situations. Keep going.
Reply ly.identity 2012-5-8 20:59
The opinions, suggestions from others, to some extent, may serve as a mirror for us to take a deep look at ourselves. Perhaps what we are afraif is not the opinions of others, but the really self, the side which is dark and weak.
Reply snowflying 2012-5-8 21:45
"it is these very different thinking that drove the society advancing."what a wonderful viewpoint!! amazing !!

actually that's not so easy to accept different viewpoints from different persons who have different bankground from different aspects. some people always like to seek the same friend at the most extent. actually i always treat different friends as my treasure too as well as thos bossom friends.  sharing comes from diversification as well as consistence, let's share.
Reply Sumingyu 2012-5-8 21:57
Although I just read a few blog entries of yours, I was most impressed with your proficiency in English and your witty argumentation and vivid description. I'm lucky to meet you here, so young a body with so old a head. As your senior, I'd like to learn from you.
As for communicating with like-minded acquaintances, this website offers us a good opportunity for which we should be grateful. Through this channel each one's circle of friends grows. And this enriches our daily life which is narrow and hard to find a bosom friend to talk to.
By the way, would you mind telling me how you have reached such a high level in English writing?
Reply Richardren 2012-5-9 01:54
sunnyv: You seem to have an accurate idea of the realities of life. You also seem to balance your life properly despite living in a remote area. Sometimes, ba
Thanks for your encouragement. Being away from my family and all the hustle and butle of life, i got this precious oppotunity to reflect seriously on everything, my life, my work, and many many subjects of the world. i wish, at fourty, i would no longer suffer from perplexity.
Reply Richardren 2012-5-9 02:05
ly.identity: The opinions, suggestions from others, to some extent, may serve as a mirror for us to take a deep look at ourselves. Perhaps what we are afraif is no
thank you so much,  friend, for giving me this new insight for the same issue from another perspective. i guess my point would be complete if i put as following : humbly accepting rational suggestions, undauntably rejecting opinions which is mean, narrow and unrational.
Reply Richardren 2012-5-9 02:26
snowflying: "it is these very different thinking that drove the society advancing."what a wonderful viewpoint!! amazing !!

actually that's not so easy
i think not every one in the society is as open minded as you are, a tolerable society is much more preferrable to a suppressing one, of which we could learn from the western countries, people there are more creative, more relaxed and more tolerable than our country does. maybe i said too far, hope i am not bore you by my didactic way of speaking,  hehe
Reply Richardren 2012-5-9 02:56
Sumingyu: Although I just read a few blog entries of yours, I was most impressed with your proficiency in English and your witty argumentation and vivid descrip
vow, you just gave me a difficult task but i am glad you like my writings, it means a lot to me if i had given you some inspiration and enjoyment. still i am not comfortable with my grammar, if you peruse carefully you would find a lot of grammatic mistakes in my writings.
Anyway, if it is helpful to you, i would like to share with you some of my experiences in writings. I always carry two notebooks with me, one is for my work another one is for taking note from my reading, I read a lot, all of them are classic and seriously heavy books, I took note whenever I encountered insightful and beautiful sentences on the front page of my notebook, then new vocabulary coupled with sentences on the back side of it. I review my notes whenever there is spare time, because the notes I took are so beautiful, that it is never a bore to review them again and again until they become a part of my own. It is through consistent efforts in accumulating ideas, sentences and vocabulary that my writing has been improving gradually without noticing it. I had to admit that many of ideas I put in writing are not originally of my own, but the amalgamation of ideas from my extensive readings. But I guess this is the necessary step to write something original in the future.
Still thanks for your attention and appreciate your eager and passion to writing.
Reply sunnyv 2012-5-9 11:08
Richardren: Thanks for your encouragement. Being away from my family and all the hustle and butle of life, i got this precious oppotunity to reflect seriously on
Forty is a golden time for men. Most people meet success around this age and hope you would have your share of success soon. You have skill in describing situations so I am sure many readers here would like to hear about your life and experience in a distant area. How different if is from the normal cities cities like Beijing or Shanghai?
Reply heai88 2012-5-9 13:35
Richardren: vow, you just gave me a difficult task but i am glad you like my writings, it means a lot to me if i had given you some inspiration and enjoyment. sti
Thank you for sharing, I like to read your writings. No pain, no gain. I have to make consistent effort like you in studying English.
Reply celina99 2012-5-9 15:19
“Opinion from others, in my mind, shall not be the dominating force in our life.” you are right, everyone lives his own life, responsible to his own wellbeings. but i do believe if we could open our mind, our life would be easier.
i also read your reply of how to practise english writing, i am so happpy that i like to take notes when i read english books too. but the difference is i seldom reread them again. as you can see my writing is still so inferior.
Reply Richardren 2012-5-9 17:18
sunnyv: Forty is a golden time for men. Most people meet success around this age and hope you would have your share of success soon. You have skill in describ
i have to say there is huge difference in many ways, economically, cutually, politically, idealogically and politically.  it would be too big a topic, maybe i could write more about it in the future.hehe
Reply Richardren 2012-5-9 17:22
heai88: Thank you for sharing, I like to read your writings. No pain, no gain. I have to make consistent effort like you in studying English.
everyone has his or her own strenghth and own perspective of life, we could always learn and share with each other, together we could make life a lit bit easier and stronger in facing of the world. let's stay together and grow together.
Reply Richardren 2012-5-9 17:29
celina99: “Opinion from others, in my mind, shall not be the dominating force in our life.” you are right, everyone lives his own life, responsible to his own
i guess we could be congeial friend for sure. i have an insatiable appetite  for vicarious experence which is easily obtainable from so many masterpieces of work in the world. it is one of quiet enjoyments always satisfied me to the last degree.
Reply Fionahere 2012-5-10 08:08
People all tend to judge others from what they say and what they do. It's okay we receive various comments from others. What matters more is how we can response to the comments huh.
Reply Richardren 2012-5-10 13:07
Fionahere: People all tend to judge others from what they say and what they do. It's okay we receive various comments from others. What matters more is how we ca
you are quite right. it is our response that will decide the outcome. we could be humble in accepting some insctinctly good adivce while being brave to the mean and arrogant ones.
Reply Fionahere 2012-5-10 22:22
Yeah, absolutely right! However, sometimes,it's a bit hard to do so huh.
Reply XueHaiWuYa 2012-5-11 00:47
I think it is better to Let go of the fears. People who like to judge will judge others all the time anyway, so don't bother trying to cater their mean opinions. Instead, we should focus on building stronger self-confidence and trust our own judgment.
Thanks for sharing.
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