Yesterday we had a big fight-- I was furious at the way people protect their past, to the point of completely losing all my

senses.

 

It started with the universal habit of women wanting to hear lies from men plus the age-long complication of wanting to be

the ONLY one.  SICK of being a substitute, I guess .When u stifle a feeling for too long (3 years?), it develops into a

kind of hazardous chemical and can gradually eat you away. It seems that no matter how  nice u treat someone ,they just won't

admit that YOU ARE THE BEST THEY EVER HAD.

 

And you just have to live with the fact that ,well, just that plain fact.

And thus they never HAD.

 

And there we went through a storm and it left wounds on both of us and for me it will never heal completely even I spill tons of honey on it. And nowthat it stare at me as I stare at it, I see a cynical smile, like the one I used to wear when I touched the past I so ruthlessly mocked.

 

 

Why can't people abandon their memory the way I do, and mock their own scars the way I do so as to make the best of the present.

Jesus, I must be the toughest-- with all my senses working.

Once some aqcuintance placed a signiture and it said something that I've just come to understand.

 

 

Will you be able to bear the weight of my heart if I give it to you?

 

Elephant heart,haha, I first thought was.

But now I see. 

Even your heart weighs a  lovely 7.5 tons and it crashes my bones to pieces--please make it fast so that I don't have time to run away.

 

 

And so there goes the Prince and Princess lived happily ever after^^