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Resignation to My Husband

1080 views. 2010-12-8 09:20 |Individual Classification:Daily Life|

This is something I wrote about Seven Year Itches, although it was inspired by the reality, it was nothing more than an outlet for some negative feelings. Therefore, don't take it seriously.
 

My dearest dear,

 
     I’m writing to tender my resignation to you. I do it with a heavy heart. I appreciate the opportunity of being your wife, and with the greatest reluctance, I decided to leave the place where I have lived for the last seven years. Serve as the wife to the man I loved and still love was a dream job. I shared joys and tears, praised and humored with you, and I dedicated my body and soul to create a world of ourselves. My faith in our home was the source of inspiration for me.

 

I still remember the wedding day when I made “till death do us apart” vow, how I was excited about our future. I liked to wake up every morning to see your smile; I liked to exchange gossip with you; and even discussing heatedly over some tiny issues seemed to be so fun! But after seven years of marriage, things have changed. Time was supposed to enhance our mutual understanding, and it was supposed to make us stay closer. But perhaps I am too childish to register the signs of “seven years itch”. I didn’t know since when our life has become stale, and since when we haven’t talked much. The kindle, we once so prided with, seemed to be dying.

 

It is inevitable that during seven years service I would become more cynical and frustrated about so-called “Equality rules” and “unfairness” in marriage. In the old times, I really enjoyed the chore and every household project. Clumsy as we were, we worked together to make things done. We teased each other about the mistakes we had made, and made loads of fun out of them. I felt elated when you said how pretty I was in apron. I was happy to see you take meals contentedly no matter how terrible the cook was. But it’s all my responsibility now. You refused to take the share of household chores because it is not manly. Further more, you constantly remind me that how the other wives cable of doing housework when I failed to tidy the rooms or something like that. While the family loads the work on one and the honor on the other; while endeavor couldn’t be recognized and appreciated, you can’t help but feeling slighted, put-upon  and hurt.

 

Things have become worse when our son has born. Raising a child is a lifelong project for us, and it needs our concerted efforts to be done. But for you he is more like a toy to play with. You are around with him when he is a happy, adorable baby, but push him away whenever he becomes fussy and crank. I was not born to calm down a crying baby, and it’s still a learning process for me. We need time to bond with our son one-on-one so that we could build up our competences in parenting. But now incompetence becomes the excuse of shying off responsibilities, while too much work, too little time make the capable one feel overwhelmed and burnout.

 

Do you still remember the teambuilding we used to engage in? We had so much fun together. I was happy because I felt involved, acknowledged and there was really great cohesiveness and tenderness. But now I am always left behind with our son when you are out with your friends. No more celebration for birthday, commemorative day and V-day because you regard them as total waste. Friends come first because they can help when you are in need. But what’s about all my efforts to take care of you and the family? Why suddenly I have become someone who could be conveniently ignored?

 

 

I am resigning because I have tired and failed to assess my fit with this job no longer. It takes two to fail a relationship. I admit that I have played my part. With all these bitter thoughts, I have become the one I despised the most. My engagingness must have tested your tolerance too. So I need some time to rest and think about our future.

 

Yours sincerely

 

Post comment Comment (15 replies)

Reply moli 2010-12-8 10:31
I am sorry to hear that.
Think it about carefully before you make any decision in life.
Reply Daisy123 2010-12-8 10:39
Can love be degenerated?
Reply bluephoebe 2010-12-8 10:41
moli: I am sorry to hear that.
Think it about carefully before you make any decision in life.
thanks for your caring. just as i mentioned it's just an outlet for some negative feelings. nothing serious. we have some issues, which couple doesn't? that's all. no big deal, and i'm sure we can work it out.
Reply bluephoebe 2010-12-8 10:42
Daisy123: Can love be degenerated?
Love won't, but passion does.
Reply Daisy123 2010-12-8 16:13
bluephoebe: Love won't, but passion does.
Passion?
Then should we believe love?
Should we still insist on love?
Reply bluephoebe 2010-12-8 16:15
Daisy123: Passion?
Then should we believe love?
Should we still insist on love?
why not?
Reply empty~empty 2010-12-8 16:52
May you happy everyday.
Reply DarlingJackson 2010-12-8 18:25
it means the losing of passion and something become habitual When love into family love,we should adapt ourself to the changed conditions.
Reply taishan369 2010-12-9 08:44
Reply lushanshan9010 2010-12-9 08:56
well ,you kill me with your words . i do think , as a woman , i think , i feel , i suffer in the time being . and also i come to realize that why the love from mother is considered the greatest one in the world , what you have said above well explains it . many thanks for your sharing of this priceless and and thought-provoking story with us here .
Reply hirondelle 2010-12-9 09:07
You really made me scared of entering into a marriage...But anyway, I think we do have a better method to deal with the problems in marriage: just to remember the original reasons that made you decide to live with this man.
Reply bluephoebe 2010-12-9 09:23
DarlingJackson: it means the losing of passion and something become habitual When love into family love,we should adapt ourself to the changed conditions.
you are absolutely right.
Reply bluephoebe 2010-12-9 09:28
hirondelle: You really made me scared of entering into a marriage...But anyway, I think we do have a better method to deal with the problems in marriage: just to
Don't be scared. any marriage has its ups and downs. when i wrote this, i was obviously in one of the downs. anything you said, or you felt in foul mood didn't count, right? Dealing with it is just like you deal with anything else in life: focus on the bright side, and try to push the dark side away.
Reply bluephoebe 2010-12-9 09:32
lushanshan9010: well ,you kill me with your words . i do think , as a woman , i think , i feel , i suffer in the time being . and also i come to realize that why the
men and women are really different. the way they feel toward their kids is no exception. father's love might not be that open and overwhelming, while mother's love is no holding back. that's our nature, and we can do nothing about it.
Reply lushanshan9010 2010-12-9 09:51
bluephoebe: men and women are really different. the way they feel toward their kids is no exception. father's love might not be that open and overwhelming, while
ah , i have no idea with what exactly i am thinking about inside my mind at the moment .

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