You are falling sleep now, so peaceful, like a little angel---an injured angel. Looking at your face, my heartbeat finally went back to its regular rhythm. However the fear, the gut-wrenching fear is still hanging there. It probably is not a good idea to write this now, focing myself to relieve everything again. However somehow I know this accident has already torn a hole in me and I might never be fully recovered. The sooner I could face it, the better.

It began as most things begin. Not on a dark and stormy night. Not foreshadowed by ominous music or dire warnings at the bottom of a teacup. It began small and innocuously. You woke up as usual. I watched you trottering away. I knew that you were heading to your snack box, and I never gave a second thought to it.

Compared to other kids around your age, you are such a careful little thing. I almost forgot that you are only four years old, and it's almost a four-year-old boy's nature  to find troubles. Anyway, I forgot to shout “Be careful!”

The next thing I knew was a huge Bang, and your scream. We rushed to the dining room, and found you sitting on the floor before the tea table. Then I saw that, that ugly deep cut on your forehead, blood oozing out. I heard your grandma’s scream, and my brain went blank. Sorry, my dear, I even dared not to look twice at your wound because merely a look has caused so many pains that my heart couldn’t contain it. My heartbeat thundered in my ears that for a moment I actually couldn’t hear anything else.  “Got the gauze!” your dad’s words finally managed to penetrate my numbness.

My hand trembled, I fumbled everyone but I couldn't find one. I finally managed to find a pad of cotton to dress your wound. Then we sent you to the hospital immediately. Sorry my dear, you have such a useless mum. I couldn’t even hold myself together to your surgery. I threw up at the gate of the hospital, half of my body start to paralyze. For the first time in my whole life, I truly understand what “shock” means.  It took all my wills not to pass out. Even at that time, you already stopped bleeding, and you chattered like nothing had happened. You are very brave. The nurse said you even didn’t cry when they sew you up.

My dear, please heal up soon.