At this moment, all I have to do is to focus on happy things only, like the coach bag my sister bought for me, like Hongkong-Macon trip next week, like my almost fit new home and Xiaoyu’s bright smile. As for things I couldn’t handle, I force myself to push them back, bury them deep inside and throw them away. I know perhaps someday they might reappear and hunt me down. But for this moment, I reminded myself to take a deep breath and relax, cause if I don’t, I might unable to stop shaking and breath again