Michael Jackson died. Yes, everyone knows that already. So this is not a news report. Media have tens of thousands of reports on this event. TIME even published a special issue on it ever since the Sept/11 attack. MJ was idol of tens of thousands of people blue-eyed or black-eyed or whatever. His pass away shock the whole world, especially the western world.

I have only one VCD of MJ. I once tried to learn his space-walking dancing by watching the VCD, but I’m just not his fan. Because I simply can’t persuade myself liking someone changed the color of his skin and wore underpants outside. It’s true. I don’t mean to defense.

When I was a middle school student, I was totally a big fan of a Korean pop group called HOT. Their dance, their songs, their hair style, their dressing style, all attracted me so much. I just couldn’t help but collecting every piece of news about them. I sang their songs though I didn’t know the meaning or could I speak Korean. I had several other friends as HOT’s fans also. We as a fan group always talking about our idol. Those days are so unforgettable.

When I was about to graduate from middle school, my idol HOT dissolved. Suddenly, there were no more idols for me to talk about or watch or imitate. I cried for a whole afternoon the day I heard the news. In my mind, no other pop stars or whatever stars can be my next idols except HOT, the one I once loved so much, so much.

Seven years later, now, I no longer have any idol. But from time to time I can still hear news of ex-members of HOT. Kangta played in a Chinese TV though not a very popular one. Moon Hee Jun is still active in entertainment field, and Tony Ann, and two others. I grow up with them as occasionally background.

Compared with fans of MJ, I’m lucky to go with my ex-idol still alive. However, my idol can’t be as immortal as that in minds of MJ’s fans.