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Marry for what ?

1497 views. 2010-5-30 22:42 |

    What is a happy marriage for a girl?To marry a man who already has a decent and well-paid job or a boy who has not reached such high position but is ambitious and still struggling ? My aunt once advised me to find a boyfriend who has got a Ph.D, for she thinks my future partner's higher academic background means higher social status and a better life available for me. But what about a man who has high academic qualification but is plain-looking ,has no charm to me at all? Will I still have a better life with such kind of men? I 'm afraid I won't.
    It is for sure that we girls need to find an abled man who is competitive or even outstanding in a school and then in future's job market,in that way it is more likely for him to provide us a more well-off life. However, the key to the happiness of marriage,I suppose, lies in the mutual love.Above all, we must marry a man who we love,not a man who merely has a lot of wealth.Without love ,marriage has no meaning of existence.Besides, it's more advisable to find a boyfriend who is superior to you in some circumstances, for we all want to marry "up",finding someone better can gives us a sense of accomplishment.  But I really don't think the single qualification of a doctor degree has any appeal to me when I 'm searching for my Mr.right. If it really matters,I will try to persuade him to go further study ,if he doesn't want to do so, I have no complaint ,as long as he is the one I really love and he loves me as well. With love, you are willing to overcome hardship and harvest sweet together in life ,so your marriage will sure be a happy one.
 What 's your opinion,my friends? please tell me.

Post comment Comment (23 replies)

Reply Elrond 2010-5-30 23:34
Ah... I,... I don't know the answer... I have no opinion,...
I don't know what to say. .. I... I shut up.
Reply C.Robert 2010-5-31 09:05
Always marry for love, never for money or status. I know chinese parents are pushing their children to marry up, but it's your job o convince them a marraige out of love will make you much more happy. You are part of this marriage, not your parents...
Reply shimizu 2010-5-31 09:19
, Marriage isn't so simple as you said, It is a unitation not only between two young people,but also between two families. It is very very difficult to find your Mr.right, almost impossible. Maybe you want to ask why, because Mr.right exists in your mind, but you live in the reality.
Reply moli 2010-5-31 11:18
None is perfect in all ways.
Reply fairy0612 2010-5-31 12:30
I think girls should marry ones who really love them, and of course, they should love the boys as well. It doesn't matter whether he has a status right now, it can be gained through his efforts. Everyone's status are not by born.
Reply huckabee 2010-5-31 17:21
Marriage for love or for convenience? A controversial issue. If a girl is provided for, either by her parents or by her own endeavor, seeking true love is at her disposal; if she is less lucky and hopes to change her life by marrying up, the matter is different. Many girls have married money and find happiness while some married for true love and ended up in divorce. Why? Love stands up for a variety of things at different stages of one man's life and  contradictory things for different people of seemingly similar background. Lots of instances can be found in everyday life. Only after marrying for some time, one year, two years, or more, can one know whether the other party is the perfect choice.
Reply ydliu88 2010-5-31 20:21
Oh!Thank you very much for your sophisticated opinion!Yes,seeking for a partner is like gambling,a lot of unforeseeable things are waiting for you.
Reply ydliu88 2010-5-31 20:28
Elrond: Ah... I,... I don't know the answer... I have no opinion,...
I don't know what to say. .. I... I shut up.
Haha!Never mind!It's indeed a very complicated issue.
Reply ydliu88 2010-5-31 20:31
C.Robert: Always marry for love, never for money or status. I know chinese parents are pushing their children to marry up, but it's your job o convince them a m
Oh!I really apprieciate your words !I'm very glad to receive advice from you foreign friends!Thank you!
Reply ydliu88 2010-5-31 20:38
shimizu: , Marriage isn't so simple as you said, It is a unitation not only between two young people,but also between two families. It is very very dif
Haha! your advice is one of the most unique ones!so you suggest me be single all my life for I can't find an ideal man ,a prince charming?Mr.right,as I concerned, it's the one who suit you most rather than the one who is flawless.
Reply ydliu88 2010-5-31 20:42
fairy0612: I think girls should marry ones who really love them, and of course, they should love the boys as well. It doesn't matter whether he has a status righ
Yes,I think so,It is crucial  that he is the one who really love you and treat you very well ,considering you as precious.
Reply ydliu88 2010-5-31 20:46
moli: None is perfect in all ways.
Yes ,It's very hard to balance all the factors and make decisions at last about who to choose , whether to receive or give up.
Reply C.Robert 2010-5-31 21:29
ydliu88: Oh!I really apprieciate your words !I'm very glad to receive advice from you foreign friends!Thank you!
I'll give you some more foreign advice, hehe.

Most of my single female chinese friends are being pushed by their parents to get married very soon. If they don't want, i usually say to them, tell your parents that you want to marry a western guy. They marry usually on a later age than Chinese girls do. It will give you some more time to find the right one.
Reply ydliu88 2010-5-31 21:55
Haha!I supposed i will not be such lucky to have a western boyfriend for most people around  me are Chinese.
Reply shimizu 2010-5-31 21:57
, Oh, no, it's not that. Maybe you are right.
Mr.right is not a dream, but you must do you best to catch it.
Goog luck!
Reply 吴欢 2010-6-7 21:17
Love without marriage is just a hollow emotion,however,the marriage without love is not perfect.I give you my best wishes.
Reply ydliu88 2010-7-3 21:56
吴欢: Love without marriage is just a hollow emotion,however,the marriage without love is not perfect.I give you my best wishes.
Thank you!
Reply empty~empty 2010-7-13 23:26
I don't know how to choose the right one,however I think the feeling is the most important.
Reply ydliu88 2010-7-14 09:04
Yes,I agree with you,but only good feelings are not enough or even vulnerable,the priority is whether he likes you as well and treat you well.
Reply wolf13 2010-10-18 13:21
Don't think much about that. Love is not meant to be calculated, planed,nether measured between wealth,degree (or opinions of relatives). It is arranged by God aready ;it happens naturally .It comes into your mind just like a delicate flawer falls gracefully into the mountain spring ,without sound .
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