I have been working as a teacher for just a few years, but now sometimes I begin to doubt my previous decision, and am wondering whether I’m suited to be a teacher. To be a teacher was ever extolled to be the most brilliant profession under the sun, but now teachers have become worthless and can be “trodden on” by anybody. After reading this article, I sighed with a deep feeling: why, teachers are only an ordinary member of this society.

One asks me: you’re engaged in the profession of education? I will answer: no. I’m only a teacher.

One asks me: you’re an engineer of human being’s soul? I will answer: no. I’m only a teacher.

One asks: your profession is the most brilliant career under the sun? I will answer: no. I’m only a teacher.

One asks: you’re a silkworm to produce silk? Or you’re a candle burning yourself to give light? My answer is: no. I’m only a teacher.

For all these questions, I have to say sorry, really sorry; I have no idea whom you’re referring to.

I’m only a teacher.

You may say: teachers should devote all they have to the great cause of our country’s education!

My answer is: no. I’m only a teacher. I’m of no difference than you: I also need a rest; I have my own family, my own children, and my own hobbies. I hope I can work and enjoy life with an ease heart just as you do; I hope my labor can be recognized by our society; I also hope my labor will bring deserved reward. And that’s all I long for. Am I wrong with that?

You may say: since you’re a teacher, it’s your duty to educate all your students to become the pillars of our country. And my answer will be as usual: no, I’m only a teacher and an ordinary man. I admit my students’ success is not my merits; they achieved success because they themselves are intelligent and diligent. Similarly, some students’ failure is not due to my fault; I have tried my best but still harvested nothing. What do you think a teacher can do to make a change and how helpless he appears, when the parents and students themselves have already given up, and only the teacher is there trying to make an attempt? What good on earth can a student’s improved academic performance bring to a teacher?

Someone ever told me: you should know there are only teachers who don’t know how to teach but no students that can’t be taught! Sorry! I’m only a teacher. I have no idea whether these words are from the mouth of an ‘expert” or a “brickpert” (a fake expert), or are they from a “professor” or a “beast”. All I know is how to do my job well and teach my students well; I know nothing more except this. However, when a student committed something wrong, out of the professional ethics or a human’s conscience, generally a teacher will choose to point his mistakes out, the teacher will then be the receiving end and is sure to get into trouble. Floods of criticisms are expected to fall on him: you should talk with my child more courteously, parents would say; there should have been more and better ways and approaches to use when it comes to education, those ‘brickperts” or “beasts” would say; who do you think you are to criticize me? Why are you always urging me to hand in homework? I hate you. The student would say.

I’m baffled; I’m a teacher; since when did I become a nanny? I have to hasten to school every day before dawn, and keep occupied thinking up new ways and tricks for an open class. Besides examining each child’s personal hygiene, I have to do sweep-ups and clean window glass, and am kept busy till evening each day. Only when I’m sure every student has left the classroom, can I finally plod home. If sometimes unlucky one student didn’t arrive home as he should, I, the nanny, am to suffer; maybe I’ll have to be bustling about for the whole night.

I’m baffled; I’m a teacher; since when did I become a policeman, one that is safeguarding the serenity and safety of the schoolyard? Every day I have to keep my eyes open and foresee and find out all kinds of hidden risks; I have to handle fairly all kinds of disputes among children; and sometimes I’ll have to build up a green barrier to keep out all tempertations and harassment from the colorful fascinating outside world.

I’m baffled; I’m only a teacher. Since when did I become a judge? “Teacher, he hit me”, “why did he fight you?” It costs me much energy every day for these “cases”; first I’ll probe into the reason for the fighting, and then try to clear up the case; after that I’ll make them apologize to each other and be friends again; and then I’ll conduct moral education to them. All the time I’m safeguarding a safe environment for my students; however, sometimes EVEN my own safety can not can be secured. But who is there to care about this?

I’m baffled; I’m only a teacher. Since when did I become a doctor, one that both knows how to treat foolishness and psychological problems? Each day I have to try to make myself look extremely spirited and energetic, and cautiously talk reasons and senses into their little minds so that they might be as civilized, obedient, diligent and progressive. Even so there are some other problems; some students are really hard to deal with; and I have to face up this.

I’m baffled; I’m only a teacher. Why do I have to be an actor: amiable for one time and then suddenly fly into rage? I’m a teacher; why do I have to be a writer? Why am I kept busy all along writing all kinds of teaching plans and treatises? I’m a teacher; why do you say I can be a peddler? Just because I have a good voice? Why am I, in some people’s eyes, an idler always enjoying vacation? Why are teachers more prone to develop throat cancer? Why in some mothers’ eyes the greatest advantage for a daughter to be a teacher is more easy to find a husband? Why in men’s eyes to marry a teacher is equivalent to having a nanny, a tutor as well as a private secretary in one?

I’m feeling baffled; what on earth am I working for? When a student dressed in fanciful costumes is playing around with some hooligans in a cyber café, the parents though maybe well aware of its potential harms, most probably will choose not to care; the student himself knows its harm but he just won’t listen to whatever you’re trying to reason into them; rather it’s likely he’ll turn a deaf ear and think you nothing but a fool. Then if one day a certain student has really committed something wrong, you’re sure to taste the bitter fruit as you have to take the responsibility for not having fulfilled your duty as an educator. My God! I’m performing my duty to the fullest each day. If there’s someone to blame, it’s no others but the parents; it’s they who have been pampering their children all the time; they are the ones to take the major responsibilities for it’s the parents not anybody else who acted as the children’s first instructors. All the teachers are afraid of trouble: they are not the legendary Ne Zha in some traditional Chinese mythology, who possessed super power and had three heads and six arms, nor are they Sun Wukong, a more able and powerful and almost invincible character in the legendary tales, who can fly into the sky or dive into the sea as he pleases. When students are not at school, they are not within our reach; things are especially so when teachers are nothing in some great parents’ eyes. What’s within a teacher’s power then is confined to saying prayers to God to bless our students, those who have such strong and exploding personalities.

When a teacher begs a student to study hard, he would say: it depends on how my feelings are going; when a teacher gently asks a student to treasure his own life, the student would say: save your words; is this your business too?; when a teacher pleads with parents to care more about their own children and to urge the children to focus more on their lessons, the parents would say: it depends on whether I have enough time available. This is what today’s education in china is like: you can not tell right from wrong or the important from the unimportant.

Who am I? I am wondering. Please, please remove the greatness from me; I’m in fact nothing but a teacher; I’m only doing what a teacher is supposed to, or rather what a teacher should do as is required by our society. If I can talk reasons into students’ minds, am I a fool to throw out all those harsh words to criticize them? When all the attempts made turned out to be fruitless, what else can I do besides flying into rage? Education is not impotent but not almighty as well, as someone says. A school is not a holy place where any problem can find its solution, and teachers are not all sages either; education is not a machine to bear and solve all the problems, and I am a teacher, a weak teacher that can not be burdened with too much, not even strong enough for those meaningless halos.

I’m only a teacher, not a nanny, not a policeman, nor a judge; I’m not a doctor, not an author, nor an actor! I’m only a teacher! I have a dream that one day I could devote all the self to my teaching job and don’t have to worry about the students’ schooling performance; that one day I could become a friend of my students, and could share with them occasionally about the meaning of life; that one day china’s education has become reasonable and rational, and is pleased by everyone……haha….I’m just having a sweet daydream! To realize the dream? Ridiculous! You must be joking! To realize this dream? Sorry! Not me! I’m only a teacher!