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My Mother-in-law
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Things didn't go well with me these days since my mother-in-law came and lived with me. She got Depression Disorder when she were young because of her husband left her and two children and went on a new life with another woman. Deep bitterness buried in her heart for many years and couldn't not be released, many years ago, she was told she got DDM and the DDM cause diabetes and hypertension, which could hardly heal again.
Two decades passed, sevearal days ago she told me she let it go and forgive her irresposible husband, I felt a bit released because my baby is coming next month, I do hope my mother-in-law can get out of depression order and be a normal grandma. But those days after living with us, she didn't feel happy, she could be a serious face in the whole day without smile. I tried to talk to her and get some knowledge from books about people who got Depression Disorder. Apprently she can not feel anything, happy or unhappy, whether a dish is deliscious or not, showing no intersts for anything. Never had she cook but only know how to knead dough and make noodles or steamed stuffed bun. Never had she tried to cook new things or do other intersting things after getting DDM.
I got frustrated after trying many times teaching her how to cook and communication things, she could forgot it the next moment. Owing my husband went on his bisness trip in Hangzhou, I do not know how to handle the situation, even worse, somehow I got a bad mood these days. What can I do?
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Post comment Comment (12 replies)
- Reply sunnyv
- Oh you are really in a no-win situation. Dealing with a normal mother-in-law is challenging enough, but you have a hot potato here. It is very difficult to deal with people with depressive disorders. No matter what you do would be wrong. It is particularly worrying because you are now in your final stages of pregnancy. Your husband may not understand your situation because he does not have to face her on a daily basis and probably he thinks it would be fine if you just tolerate her. It is not that simple.
The best thing to do now is to try your best to avoid friction and keep your yourself calm. A small incident could trigger a serious reaction from your mother in law. The biggest priority is your baby now. Just let the baby arrive in a warm and happy home.
It would be better when your husband is back by your side. Meanwhile, just take it easy and handle things calmly as it comes. Know your priorities and keep calm.
- Reply moli
- You are indeen in a dilemma.
After all, she is an old woman, your mother-in-law. All you can do is to show your love for her by getting along with her.
- Reply teadrinking
- It is hard to be mother-in-law, and now you got the tough situation, and particulary you are now conceiving your bady, so first things first, to let everything all right at best, she, anyway, is an old lady who has suffered a lot, especially in mentality, so whatever, try to be ok with it, though I konw it is really hard, but for the sake of baby at present, you have to. When your hushand come back, more or less, you have a backbone to comfort you.
Life is hard, every family also has a story.
- Reply poorman
- The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is really complex? fortunately I am a man. But as a daughter-in-law, you will be a mother-in-law possibly in future. the young generation firstly should respect old generation no matter what you are daughter-in-law or not.
- Reply Kimi011812
- Thanks for the comforting and understanding, I'll try to be Ok and accept which can not be changed right now. Fortunately, I'll go home and stay with my mom in two weeks, waiting for the baby come to this world.
teadrinking: It is hard to be mother-in-law, and now you got the tough situation, and particulary you are now conceiving your bady, so first things first, to let e ...
- Reply Kimi011812
- I guess u didn't finish reading the article, there's no related with Respect between the two generation, each families differs from others
poorman: The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is really complex? fortunately I am a man. But as a daughter-in-law, you will be a mother-i ...
- Reply Kimi011812
- right, keep calm and just do what I can do,baby goes first, thanks for the comforting
sunnyv: Oh you are really in a no-win situation. Dealing with a normal mother-in-law is challenging enough, but you have a hot potato here. It is very difficu ...
- Reply gino
- I am worried about your current situation,the first things you must keep a good mood and waiting for your husband come back,there is nothing important than your baby,the second,your mother-in-law,you need take her like a little child,it is a good thing when she do not to do anything,
- Reply Kimi011812
- She often lost herself in thinking nothing in her own world, what I can do is just talk to her after work and show her some variety show on computer.
gino: I am worried about your current situation,the first things you must keep a good mood and waiting for your husband come back,there is nothing important ...
- Reply gino
- I understand your mood,I mean you keep your good mood and do not effect your mood cause your mother-in-law's behavior ,keep current situation till your husband back.
Kimi011812: She often lost herself in thinking nothing in her own world, what I can do is just talk to her after work and show her some variety show on computer.
- Reply teadrinking
- It is the most happy moment to welcome the new baby, best wishes in advance.
Kimi011812: Thanks for the comforting and understanding, I'll try to be Ok and accept which can not be changed right now. Fortunately, I'll go home and stay with ...
