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英语六级5分作文范文批改2

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  英语六级待批改作文:

  The cellphone is more and more common in our daily life, you can hardly imagine that few years ago, cellphone is the previlege for little people. In 1999, the number of cellphone users are just 200, then it came to about 500 in 2002. In 2005, the data sharply increased to 900.
  Why the users of cellphone increase so quickly? Initially,the primary reason is that the increase of income. With the higher income, people would willing to enjoy a more convinence life. Another equally significant reason for this change is the decrease of the cost of making a cellphone. Taking advantage of the high technology,  the indurstry can use little labor and cheaper meterial to produce cellphones. All of these have made the price of cellphone affordable.
  This phenomenon is a signal of the increase of people's life comdition and the spread of high technology, which is a really good thing for the society. There is no doubt that in the future, with the continuesly increase of economy and technology, more and more people will have the cellphone and enjoy the convinence of it.

 

   英语六级作文批改如下:
  The cellphone(这不是一个词,加空格) is more and more common in our daily life, you can hardly imagine that few years ago, cellphone is the(改为a)previlege(拼写错误,改为privilege)for little people(改为a few people). In 1999, the number of cellphone users are(改为is) just 200, then it came to about 500 in 2002. In 2005, the data sharply increased to 900.
  Why the users of cellphone increase(改为increased) so quickly? Initially, the primary reason is that the increase of income. With the higher income, people would (加be)willing to enjoy a more convinence(改为convenient) life. Another equally significant reason for this change is the decrease of the cost of making a cellphone. Taking advantage of the high technology, the indurstry(拼写错误,改为industry) can use little labor and cheaper meterial(拼写错误,改为materials) to produce cellphones. All of these have made the price of cellphone affordable.
  This phenomenon is a signal of the increase of people's life(改为living)comdition(拼写错误,改为condition)and the spread of high technology, which is a really good thing for the society(语法错误). There is no doubt that in the future, with thecontinuesly(改为continuous) increase(改为improvement) of economy and technology, more and more people will have the (删除)cellphone and enjoy the convinence(拼写错误,改为convenience) of it.

 

  The number of 是…的数量的意思,谓语动词用单数;a number of 是大量的意思,谓语动词用单数。Initially和the primary reason的意思一样。写作文时细心一点,尽量避免单词拼写的错误。注意固定搭配。Which放在逗号后面,修饰的是前面一整句话的内容。


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