有时“不错”好过“完美”

i was inspired by an observation by voltaire to make my resolution “don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good.” in other words, instead of pushing yourself to an impossible “perfect,” and therefore getting nowhere, accept “good.” many things worth doing are worth doing badly.

i have a friend who never exercises unless she’s training for a marathon; as a consequence, she almost never exercises. i never push myself when i exercise, and although i suspect she scoffs at my wimpy workouts, i’ve managed to get myself to exercise several times a week for years. if i’d tried to have a more ambitious workout, i’m sure i wouldn’t have exercised at all.

along the same lines, i told a friend that one of my happiness-project resolutions was to "remember birthdays," and so i was sending out happy-birthday e-mails. he said, "oh, you shouldn't e-mail! you should call or write a hand-written note; that's much nicer." true—but i won't. and it's better to get something done imperfectly than to do nothing perfectly.

the perfect can also become the enemy of the good in the quest for perfect information. there are two ways to approach decision-making: as a satisficer (yes, that is a word) or as a maximizer.

satisficers are those who make a decision or take action once their criteria are met. that doesn’t mean they’ll settle for mediocrity; their criteria can be very high, but as soon as they find the pasta sauce or the business card that has the qualities they want, they’re satisfied. maximizers want to make the optimal decision. even if they see a bicycle or a backpack that meets their requirements, they can’t make a decision until after they’ve examined every option, to make the best possible choice. studies suggest that satisficers tend to be happier than maximizers; maximizers spend a lot more time and energy to reach a decision, and they’re often anxious about whether they did, in fact, make the best choice. (for a fascinating discussion, read barry schwartz’s the paradox of choice.)

in almost every category, i’m a satisficer, and in fact, i often felt guilty about not doing more research before making decisions. but it’s one of my secrets of adulthood: most decisions don’t require extensive research. in picking a girls’ summer camp, a friend got information from 25 camps and visited five in person. we got information from five camps and picked the one that a friend’s daughter loved. i used to think that my lack of diligence was a sign of laziness, and my resolution “don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good” has made me feel a lot better.

in some situations, the happier course is to know when good enough is good enough and not to worry about perfection or making the perfect choice.

 

伏尔泰曾说过：“别因为苛求完美而错过美好的结果。”在这句话的影响下，我决定如此这般行事。换言之，逼迫自己去追逐不可能实现的“完美”而最终一事无成，还不如接受“不错”。很多事情值得一做，而且非常值得一做。

我的一个朋友除了做马拉松训练不愿意做任何锻炼；结果，她几乎从不锻炼。我从不在锻炼时苛求自己，而且尽管相信她会嘲笑我的锻炼强度太小，我已经做到多年来每个星期都坚持做几次。如果我过去为自己设定高强度的训练计划，我想我肯定一点锻炼都不曾做。

本着同样的精神，我告诉一个朋友我的“幸福计划”方案之一便是“记住别人的生日”，并且我常常在别人生日当天发出祝福的e-mail.他说：“你不应该发电子邮件，你应该打电话或者寄一封手写信，那才象样嘛。”他说的的确有道理，不过我不会这么做。如果对事情的完美要求使我们无法做到的话，还不如去先做出某些结果，就算做得不够完美。

在寻求信息的时候，完美主义同样是表现不错的敌人。做决定时通常有两种方法，一种是立即行动，一种是尽善尽美。