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外国最新英语幽默笑话精粹95:谁死的更惨(中英)

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Three stood by the golden gate and St. Peter said,St. Peter said, “sorry,we' re all filled up, so only one of you can come into heaven. So, out of you three, the one who had the most tragic death of all may enter the heaven.”

三个男人站在天堂门外,圣彼得说:“对不起,我们这里已经人满为患你们中只有一个人能够进人天堂。所以,你们三个人当中死得最惨的那个才能进入。”

The first man spoke, "well,I am a newlywed and I tend to get jealous of my wife and her male friends, so I forbid her to see any of them when I was at work. But today I came home early and saw two wine glasses on the coffee table and when I asked my wife what was going on, she blushed and was silent. I searched the entire house for her male friend and finally I spotted someone’s hands grasping the railing on our balcony. In a fit of rage I stomped on the hands until the rascal fell 15 stories down into the bin below. When I realized he was still alive, I unhooked my fridge and throw it over the railing. In the process of doing this, I had a heart attack.”

第一个人说:“我刚结婚不久,很嫉妒我的妻子和他的男性朋友,所以在我上班的时候,我禁止她见任何的男性朋友。但是今天我回家较早,看见咖啡桌上放着两个葡萄酒杯,当我问妻子发生了什么事情的时候,她红着脸不说话。我搜遍了整个屋子想找出那个男人,最后发现有个人的手抓住了我家
凉台的栏杆。我对着那双手就是一阵狂踢,直到那个流氓从十五楼上掉下去,可惜下面正好有一堆纸箱,当我得知他还活着时,就搬起家里的冰箱从阳台上向下砸去,然后就突发心脏病身亡。”

St. Peter replied, "wow, that's too bad. Next?"

圣彼得说:“噢,够惨的。下一个?”

The second man began to speak,` I am a window washer and I was minding my own business and washing the seventeenth story windows at an apartment when my safety rope snapped and I began to fa11.I reached out and in a stroke of luck on to a balcony railing on the fifteenth. I was trying to catch my breath and wait it for someone to rescue me when some lunatic started to stomp on my hands until I lost my grip and fell into the bin below. I opened my eye in disbelief only to see a fridge come crashing down onto my head.”

第二个人说:“我是一个窗户清洁工,一天我正在清洗公寓十七楼的窗户,安全带不幸突然崩断,我开始坠落,但幸运的是我抓住了十五楼阳台的栏杆,我屏住了呼吸等着人来救我,突然有个神经病人乱踢我的手,直到我失手掉进下面的一堆纸箱。我睁开眼睛一看,一个冰箱正朝我的头上砸来。”

St. Peter replied: "my, my. . . that is bad. Next?"

圣彼得说:“哎哟,……够惨的。下一个?”

The third man spoke last, "well, I was hiding in the fridge when. . .”

第三个最后说:“哎,我当时正藏在冰箱里,突然……”


 

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