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英汉双语笑话40

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1.

Not Knowing Her Well

Wife: Bill, the man in that house opposite always kisses his wife when he leaves in the morning and he kisses her again when he comes back in the evening. Why don't you do that too?

Husband: Well, I don't know her very well yet.

我跟她还不熟

妻子:比尔,住在对面那所房子的那个男人早上出门前总要吻一下妻子,晚上回来时再吻一下,你为什么不那样做呢?”

丈夫:哦,我跟她还不是很熟。

2.

No Problem

A bald man took a seat in a beauty shop. "How can I help you?" asked the stylist. "I went for a hair transplant," the guy explained, "but I couldn't stand the pain. If you can make my hair look like yours without causing me any discomfort, I'll pay you $5,000."

"No problem," said the stylist, and he quickly shaved his head.

没问题

  一个秃头的男人坐在理发店里。发型师问:“有什么可以帮你吗?”那个人解释说:“我本来去做头发移植,但实在太痛了。如果你能够让我的头发看起来像你的一样,而且没有任何痛苦,我将付给你5000美元。”

  “没问题,”发型师说,然后他很快帮自己剃了个光头。

3.

Who Are Crooks?

A newspaper once carried an editorial which stated bluntly that half the city council were crooks. Under penalty of arrest, the editor issued following retraction: "HALF THE CITY COUNCIL AREN'T CROOKS."

谁是骗子?

  一次,一份报纸刊登了一篇社论,直接指出市议会里有一半人是骗子。在被罚以拘留后,编辑发表了以下声明:“市议会里有一半人不是骗子。”

4.

A New Employee

Several weeks after a young man had been hired, he was called into the personnel director's office.

"What is the meaning of this?" the director asked. "When you applied for the job, you told us you had five years' experience. Now we discover this is the first job you ever held."

"Well," the young man said, "in your advertisement you said you wanted somebody with imagination."

一个年轻人在被雇用几个星期后,被叫到人事经理的办公室。

  “这是什么意思?”经理问,“当你申请这份工作时,你告诉我们有五年工作经验,现在我们发现这其实是你的第一份工作。”

  “嗯,”年轻人回答,“你们的广告上说需要找一个有想象力的人嘛。”

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